Today, my girlfriend expected me to strip for her at her place. It was going to be her first time seeing me naked. When I got to the private part of stripping, she giggled and said I was a funny guy. She then broke up with me. FML
Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML
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